Shootin' the Breeze

and random targets

Everybody’s Hurting

In response to a family conflict, a well-meaning elderly woman whom I know has said “Everybody is hurting,” as if it excuses wrongdoers by failing to distinguish between perpetrators of hurt and victims of those perpetrators. 



Everybody is hurting

But the hurting is not the same.

Some are doing the hurting

And that is a shame.


Some are being hurt

By unkind relatives

Who try to divide,

Who never forgive


There is a difference

Between causing hurt

And being hurt;

Between attacking

And being attacked;

Between reaching out

And being ignored;

Between forgiving

And being unforgiven;

Between being inclusive

And being excluded;

Between unconditional love

And love withheld.


Love withheld as a bribe

Is not love at all.

Rather, it is a tool

Of manipulation.


Grandchildren are harmed by denying them access to grandparents’ love.

There is no excuse for that.

 All enablers of exclusion are just as guilty of harming the children.

There is no excuse for that.



Everybody’s hurting?  Yes, everybody is. 

Some are perpetrators of hurt.

Others are recipients of it.

There is a big difference.




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