Shootin' the Breeze

and random targets

Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell

Miss Sugar is a pretty nice landlady.  She is a trusting soul.  She treats tenants as if everyone is trustworthy.   Guess what!  Not everyone is.

A few years ago we had trouble with a man who rented a house and was good about paying his rent until trouble came.  The trouble resulted in him spending a couple weeks in jail and everyone knows that it is difficult to pay rent from the confines of the jailhouse.  Apparently, it is also impossible to make a phone call to one’s landlady to inform her that you are incarcerated but your pit bulls are not; rather, your pit bulls are HOME ALONE.

I don’t blame the pit bulls for getting hungry, but I do question the decision of their owner/our tenant to not provide for them.  Consequently, the abandoned dogs had to make do with carpet, drapes, woodwork, etc.  Maybe they hunted in the backyard too because the patio door was left open for their convenient egress and ingress.  The open door was also convenient for other critters if they chose to visit.

Guess what!  That guy did not get his deposit back.

We have had wonderful tenants as well.  I must give credit where credit is due.

Recently, we hired a repairman to patch some holes in the walls.  Query:  Have you, gentle readers, ever punched six holes in the wallboard in your homes?  You don’t have to answer that.  My answer for myself is — never.    Nor have I left the imprint of my foot in a hollow door.

The repairman also noted that the linoleum in the lower level is no longer intact.  He guessed that the tenants had been watering plants down there, which caused the adhesive to fail.  I don’t know much about hydroponic growing.  Why couldn’t they just grow the plants in the backyard?

Don’t answer that if you live in a state other than Colorado or Washington.  In many states, the possession of pot is illegal, just like it is under federal law.

Maybe Sugar should in the future ask in the lease application not only about pets, but also about “indoor gardening.”

On the other hand, maybe it is best to not ask.  Or tell.


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7 thoughts on “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell

  1. You should know cowboy you’re an attorney, sometimes ignorance is bliss.

  2. Hmmm… Who paid the electric bill? 🙂

    • The tenants are supposed to pay. If they don’t, the city utilities let us know.

      • I’m sure you realize I asked that question because cultivation of (illicit) foliage indoors requires a lot of (artificial) light and (artificial) heat… 🙂 Here in LA, sometimes an entire 2,500 square foot house and the garage are used as well. It’s a shame.

  3. 2-car garage! Why would windows be covered? Why snakes in the kitchen? Why a 120lb. dog? It just seems like they did not want company or peeping Toms.

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