Shootin' the Breeze

and random targets

Archive for the tag “California”

Kim K Copies My Fashion

kim-kardashian-torn-jeans

Very recently, I saw a photo of Kim Kardashian wearing jeans with holes in the areas of her thighs and knees.  My first thought was that she must be bucking bales of hay because I have over the years had many pairs of jeans with that exact same look.  I suspect that Kim and other fashion leaders noticed me at the feed store or while I was doing chores.  I know I look good in jeans, but I always believed women were studying my Wrangler butt.  Apparently, they study my thighs as well.

Here is how to get holes in the thigh area of one’s jeans.  As you lift bales of hay, use your leg to help bring the bales to your middle area immediately prior to using your arms to lift the bales above your waist or even head, depending upon how high you are stacking the bales or throwing them onto the hay wagon as another person standing on the wagon aka hay rack (as in hay rack ride), to stack bales there.  I perfected the technique as a young teen trying to keep up with older fellas picking up hay bales from the field and then handling them again to stack the bales in the hay loft of the barn.  “More bales!” we would yell, implying that the other cowboys were not keeping up with our respective selves, the superior workers.

Kim did not explain the worn-out jeans that she was wearing so she might not want me to explain the process of achieving that look.  She does not seem the type to throw bales of hay, but now you know.  I see her in a whole different light.  What a hard-working cowgirl!  I had previously thought she shopped on Rodeo Drive in Beverly Hills or Hollywood or wherever it is.  I do suggest she get more sensible footware.  I wear cowboy boots.  They have heels, but not spindly ones such as Kim wears above.  I doubt she wore those shoes in the hay fields.

I hesitate to publish this because I fear that a bunch of California girls will be contacting me to ask about stacking hay bales.  I will have to reject their assistance.  After all, I am married to Miss Texas and she looks good in her jeans with or without holes in the thighs.  Kim could learn a lot from Miss Texas but I wonder if she is capable of grasping what Miss Texas knows.  Miss Texas is way out of Kim’s league.

Modeling

scamp bowing

Take a bow, Miss Texas!  (I doubt Kim can ride a trick horse).

Beau Shares Breakfast

The marathon of Beau stories continues. This post from a year ago should be up-dated to inform you that Michelle returned to Nepal. Her primary motive may have been to escape Beau.

Shootin' the Breeze

Michelle is a world traveler.  She recently returned from four months in Nepal, where she climbed to base camp for Mount Everest and stayed to volunteer at a monastery, teaching English.  She lived with a Nepali family.  I think eight people slept in one room.  The bathroom facilities consist of a hole in the floor and cold water.  She has experienced many diverse cultures. She has traveled to many foreign lands, including South America, Central America, Europe,Thailand, and even California.

Last week, she came to our house to visit for a few days of hardship.  It was below zero the whole time.  Plus, our internet is slow.

Sugar cooked a good breakfast on the first morning of Michelle’s visit.  Sadly, Michelle, the world traveler, is not equipped to cope with the rigors of our kitchen.  She made a cultural mistake.  She failed to adequately guard her plate. 

“Mom,” (that is what Michelle…

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