My wife has been holding me back from realizing my full potential. Again.
You might recall reading in another post how she failed to show the proper enthusiasm for my plan to be a professional gambler. Well, she is at it again.
“Sugar,” I said, “I have been reading some self-improvement literature that has inspired me to become whatever I desire to become, with no limitations. I read that sometimes a person needs to quit his or her job and thus be free to explore. Free to be me. ”
“I thought being a lawyer was your vocational goal that, by the way, you were allowed to achieve. Wasn’t that your ‘whatever I desire to become’?”
“Yes. It used to be, among other things, such as my NFL career, but I have been a lawyer for a pretty long time and I like to change jobs every thirty years or so, you know, just to stay fresh.”
“So what is your alternate plan now that you were not drafted by an NFL team? Again.”
“For your information, I am still available as a free agent. Me and Tim Tebow and a lot of good players are free agents. I am what is known as an undrafted free agent.”
“Yes, I have heard you explain that many times over many years. It is very impressive indeed, but maybe, after thirty years, you should replace that goal of playing in the NFL. If you quit practicing law, what are you going to do while awaiting that call from an NFL team? Maybe it isn’t in the cards, even for a perfect physical specimen such as you are. Maybe God knows that it would not be fair to the other guys on the field.”
“I was thinking of being an astronaut or something cool like that, provided NASA agrees to call forwarding of NFL calls.”
“Wouldn’t motion sickness be a drawback?” Sugar can be very direct. It is not an attractive quality.
“Hey, the Mind Eraser at the amusement park does not count. It is way worse than a simple spacecraft.”
“Well, maybe you should go back to your earliest inner and outer self-identity. You know, feeling free to be the real you. Look inside the essence of your being. What are your first memories? How did you see yourself at age two? At age four? At age twelve? Sixteen? What was your passion then, when you had no responsibilities? What made you truly happy?”
“Being a cowboy!”
“Exactly. That is who you are.”
I saw her point. ” So you are saying that I should be a Cowboy-Astronaut? When I am not on a space mission, I could record country songs and rodeo a little.”
“I was thinking Cowboy Lawyer. We do live on a ranch. You could ride horses in your spare time, when you are not going to your law office or court. How does that sound?”
“Sugar, that is a perfect idea. I am glad we had this talk. That sounds like a satisfying life. I will give it a whirl. You are an excellent vocational counselor. Thanks for providing clarity.”
Nevertheless, if the Broncos need me, I have to be flexible about re-arranging my vocational status.