I do not know if any of my loyal readers are graduates of M.I.T. or any other fine engineering school. (I myself am largely self-taught as a mechanical engineer, yet I do not denigrate the path of those who felt the need for mentoring). If you are an engineer, you might learn something from me today. If you are merely a member of the general public, you still might learn something, provided the subject is not way over your head.
First, some family history: my maternal grandfather on my mother’s side was a civil engineer who worked for Union Pacific Railroad (as distinguished from a locomotive engineer who operates trains and probably has much more fun). Like me, he did not go to engineering school, nor to college of any sort, going directly to work after graduating from high school. One day at church, a man who knew my grampa at U.P., came up to me and asked whether I knew that the man who replaced my grampa had a Ph.D.
So, apparently I have engineering genes so strong that actual coursework is unnecessary. And that brings me to the topic of the day. I put together TWO home projects in ONE week.
My ever confident wife, Miss Sugar, purchased two items which each came in a box clearly labeled “Assembly Required.”
One of the projects was a fire pit from Home Depot. It is no longer in the box. It is actually assembled. You should have seen me. Anyway, we have had four successful fires. Grampa would be proud.
The other project was a bird bath. There were six, waddayacallem, yea, bolts, and just as many, you know what I mean, nuts. I won’t explain the entire process. All you need to know is that the finished product is already in use. Charlie Sheen and I call that WINNING!
If you, loyal readers, ever have any home improvement projects, now or in the future, simply call my toll free number for expert assistance over the phone.
I will let you know when the number is working. I have delegated that to Miss Sugar.