To those of you who know me only as Big Bronc, the successor King of the Wild Frontier, I hope it does not disappoint you to learn that I also make the world a better place in my role as The Lawman, Advocate for Western Justice. I work at the World Headquarters for Western Justice, which is located right here in Northern Colorado.
My trophy wife, Miss Sugar, holds the position of Office Manager, awarded to her through a system of nepotism. Consequently, she is present at The World Headquarters when Big City Lawyers from Denver are obliged to travel to Fort Collins to deal with me in my persona as Just a Country Lawyer.
Miss Sugar, still a handsome woman for her advanced age, was, back in the day, a finalist in the Miss Texas USA pageant, winning the swimsuit competition, leading to a professional modeling career and appearances on an obscure television series called Dallas. Big deal.
Who says that I wasn’t a professional model too? For your information, I’ve done a little modeling here and there. Well, just there, in Omaha, Nebraska, when I appeared in a print ad for the grand opening of the teen department at Nebraska Clothing, which is now out of business, but I do not accept the blame. You could kind of recognize the back of my head as I tried on a coat. I was photographed while shopping with my mother. We are both pretty sure it was me trying on the coat, which we did not purchase. No wonder they went out of business. Although we were offered a discount for the coat as compensation for my modeling, when Mom declined anyway, the guy who asked to take my picture compensated me in another manner, by giving me one of the prizes intended for the Grand Opening. I was awarded a real cool flashlight. Those of you familiar with legal definitions will recognize that being paid for the publication of my image makes me a professional model. I have cut back on my modeling career since that particular gig, so I could focus on seventh grade and beyond.
I don’t talk about my modeling in front of Miss Sugar because I am fairly certain that she was never in The Omaha World Herald and I don’t want her to feel inferior. We were in different niches of the market. To be fair, I was not in the Dallas Morning News as she was, nor on the cover of any lingerie catalogs, nor did I model at Dallas Apparel Mart BECAUSE I was very picky about allowing my image to be “used” to sell products. The only reason Miss Sugar had to do that stuff was because the Kim Dawson Agency arranged them. I did not require an agent. As I described, Nebraska Clothing approached me.
It is generally recommended that being “equally yoked” is a good idea. As used in the Bible, that means being married to another believer, and we do indeed share our religious beliefs as Christians. However, both being professional models and all, I liked to think we were equally yoked in that sense as well.
That is what I liked to think. That is what I liked to think until one of those Big City Denver Lawyers came to my office to spend the day taking depositions for a case we were litigating. Of course I introduced him to my lovely wife. As he left at the end of the day, he unkindly volunteered, “Man, you sure married way above your station in life.”
He is absolutely correct. I married above my station in life by every measure. Lucky me!